Pull your jeans off the rack, and put them on. First, open the zipper and shake them well. Lift your right leg and insert it into the pant leg. This usually will work without a hitch. Next, pull the pant leg up. All is well, probably.
Now, insert your left leg into the other pant leg. This could get tricky, but hopefully not. Only in extreme cases will we find a struggle here. Now, pull the jeans up, all the way up, snugly. Cool. Ha?
Here is the real test. Can you close the button? Come on, tug! Suck it up! Ah. Okay, now pull up the zipper. Breathe slowly…
If you don’t pass out after five minutes, and, if you can sit down without extreme pain in your abdomen, you may have lost some weight.
Okay. I know. I’m getting obsessed with this weight thing. Why not make it fun?
Any funny stories?